After months of speculation as to how far off the mark the new Fantastic Four movie would be it would seem that it was confirmed today by a trailer that makes it look like a SyFy movie voiced over by Batman:
- Stock helicopter footage of a city and some hill – fade to black.
- A shot of Grimm Salvage – a meta subtext?
- It then pans up to the stars – which is ironic as they are ignoring all those plot points in this film.
- Car racing across field – lame inference.
- Science geek kid – lamer inference.
- Some people getting shut in cheap looking metal drums – the kind you saw in half to make a BBQ!
- Fade to black.
- Twentyish government officials sat around the worlds smallest meeting table.
- A guy with glasses walking along smiling – looks a bit sure a killer like – wait a minute he has glasses – he must the Science Geek Kid from earlier!
- The hot girl from American Horror Story is listening to her headphones at work, oh, ok it’s like a big radar.
- Some skinny young kid is playing baseball,
- Another guy is fixing a car – he must be the speeding car guy from earlier.
- An older black guy looks concerned. He must be the Mr Storm.
- Six guys is space suits climb into compartments in a machine.
- One of them has glasses – could be that guy from earlier.
- Looks like it all goes wrong and blows up! Im guessing Mr Storm dies!
- Wait! Weird things are happening to some of the survivors, the one’s who actually knew each other before hand – how fortuitous!
- There’s some injured guy in a hospital bed (Victor Von Hacker?)
- Then we close out with an upgraded scene from Gauntlet with our four characters staring at a light shooting out the ground, very similar to the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers movie.
VERDICT: If I knew nothing about The Fantastic Four this film would do little to intrigue me to do so – not even a Yancy Street sign!
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