CULT FACTION

For all your cult film, tv, cartoon, comic and video game needs

The Meg (2018)

Anybody that knows me knows that dumb, schlock-filled shark films are a passion of mine. I’ve seen them all, Megashark vs Giant Octopus, Sharknado 1-5, Ghost Shark, Zombie Shark, Sand Sharks, Snow Sharks, if there is a low budget shark film with a mildly intriguing prefix I am there. The more ridiculous the better!

Well what happens when you give these usually shoestring budget films a $150 million budget?

You get The Meg starring Jason Statham as rescue diver Jonas, who is called in by a research crew to fight the previously assumed extinct Megalodon, a giant shark capable of biting through a whale in one bite.

This film is based on the series of books of the same name by Steve Alten and over its opening day earned $45 million, a surprisingly high number considering the negative reviews that it was bombarded with. I had a long list of expectations for The Meg which it needed to meet. The extremely long list is as follows;

1: Real big Shark
2: Jason Statham
3: Jason Statham fighting a real big Shark.

Oh did I say long? I meant incredibly short and stupid.

Unbiasedly and objectively this film was terrible. A generic plot, trash characters, terrible CGI and ridiculous dialogue would have made this film damn near unwatchable were it not for the fact that I was completely enraptured. I cannot really compliment much of this film. Statham sounds like he is holding back when he says things, giving his gravelly voice a clipped quality to it. He sings “just keep swimming” at one point which I was fully on-board with.

One complaint was that the characters were legitimate idiots. After killing the first Megalodon (spoilers there are two because who didn’t see that coming?) One of the characters just leaps into the water and begins frolicking about as if he didn’t just nearly die. He is, of course promptly chomped.

Speaking of unnecessary deaths by my count there are at least 2 sacrifices in this film that are not at all needed. These just serve to try and add some cheap emotional weight to an otherwise pithy flick.

VERDICT: Objectively speaking this film is terrible, but if you are a purveyor of so bad it’s good films you will enjoy this film as I did. The climax of the film sees Statham try and blow up the shark with a torpedo which jams and doesn’t release. He then decides to use the propellers of his submarine to cut the shark down its stomach and then stab it in its eye which causes a feeding frenzy that kills the Meg once and for all. Yes, you read that right. Jason Statham shanks a shark to death in this film. Ultimately if this were a subjective review I would give it a 12/10 for being everything I need in a terrible film but this review is objective and so I can only give The Meg a 5/10 for its nonsensical and ridiculous concept and it’s even worse execution.

Related Posts
Young Rock Ep.1: Working the Gimmick

A TV series focusing on the most electrifying man in Sports Entertainment history was an interesting idea but Young Rock plays it well with numerous time periods playing out across Read more

Willy’s Wonderland (2021)

It’s your birthday and we want you to have fun.  That’s the ear worm that will stay with you for days after watching this movie.  Unfortunately, that’s all you’ll leave Read more

Trailer released for The Meg

Jason Statham (Spy, Furious 7, The Expendables, Snatch) and award-winning Chinese actress Li Bingbing (Transformers: Age of Extinction, Forbidden Kingdom, The Message) star in the science fiction action thriller The Read more

The X-Files Season 1 Ep. 1: Pilot

It has been twenty-eight years since The X-Files first graced our screens and now with all the episodes hitting Disney+ I figured it might be time to revisit a televison Read more

The Tangle (2021)

Written, directed by, and starring Christopher Soren Kelly, The Tangle brings its audience into a futuristic world controlled by AI where people spend their time jacked into a Matrix like Read more

The SHARKNADO – The 4th Awakens teaser trailer has arrived!

Sharknado - The 4th Awakens... the first teaser trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo0pDjWZpQQ We can confirm Ian Ziering will reprise his role as shark-fighting hero Fin Shepard, while Tara Reid is set to return as Read more

The Block Island Sound (2020)

What’s killing all the fish and why are birds dropping dead from the sky? This movie offers up a multitude of candidates from chemtrails to secret government mind control and Read more

Space Sweepers (2021)

The initiated will know that Asia have been delivering high quality, and some of the most original storylines and films throughout the history of cinema. Something that the mainstream movie Read more

Solar Opposites Ep. 1: The Matter Transfer Array

Created by Justin Roiland and Mike McMahan, Solar Opposites Ep. 1: The Matter Transfer Array takes place one year after aliens Korvo (voiced by Roiland), Terry (Thomas Middleditch), and their child-replicants Yumyulack Read more

Slaxx (2021)

Written by Patricia Gomez and Elza Kephart, and directed by Kephart, Slaxx stars Romane Denis, Brett Donahue, Sehar Bhojani, and Stephen Bogaert. It is a movie which casts a strong Read more

%d bloggers like this: